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An E-mailer's Pledge
NOW EVERYONE SAY IT WITH ME:
"I won't get bad luck, lose my friends, lose my mailing lists, hear any music, or see a cool pop up screen if I don't forward this.
Bill Gates is NOT going to send me money, Victoria's Secret doesn't know anything about a gift certificate they're supposed to send me, and Ford will not give me a 50% percent discount even if I HAVE forwarded my e-mail to more than 50 people.
I will NEVER receive gift certificates, coupons or freebies from Coca Cola, Cracker Barrel, or Old Navy if I send this to 10 people who don't know who I am anyway.
I will NEVER see a pop up window if I forward this....NEVER!!!! My phone will not MYSTERIOUSLY ring after I forward this.
There is NO SUCH THING as an Email tracker, and I am not STUPID enough to think that someone will send me $100 for forwarding this to 10 or more people.
There is no kid with cancer through the Make-a-Wish program in England collecting anything. He did when he was 7 yrs old, but he is now cancer free and 35 years old and DOESN'T WANT ANY MORE POSTCARDS, CALLING CARDS OR GET WELL CARDS!
The government does not have a bill in Congress called 901B (or whatever they named it this week) that if passed will enable them to charge us 5 cents for every sent e-mail.
There will be NO cool dancing, singing, waving, colorful flower, character, or program I will receive immediately after I forward this. People are just trying to talk me into doing it to make me look like a fool.
The American Red Cross will not donate 50 cents to a certain individual dying of some never heard of disease for every email address I send this to. The American Red Cross RECEIVES donations; they don't donate.
And finally, I WILL NOT let others guilt me into sending things on to my friends for fear they will think I am not their friend...or by telling me I have no conscience or don't believe in GOD.
If God wants to send me a message, I believe the
bushes in my yard will burn before he picks up a
PC to pass it along...but even if it does come by
e-mail, HE will send me one at which point I'm
SURE I will know it will be from HIM. AND if he does,
I'm sure he will care enough to delete all those
annoying forwarded '>>>>>>>>' in it!"
Now, repeat this 4 times to yourself until you've memorized it, and then send it along to at least 5 of your friends before the next full moon, or you will be constipated for the next 3 months!
-- Anon.
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